A Day, A Week, Hemant, A Year

The day-to-day of a common geek.

Archive for the 'comedy' Category

Overheard in Saskatoon

During a deep philosophical debate on the subject of whether or not fire is a living organism, this exchange was overheard.

Fire is Not an Organism Girl: Well I know for sure that prions are not living organisms.
Fire is an Organism Guy: What’s a prion?
Fire is Not an Organism Girl: They’re those things that live in your brain.

Debate over.

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Overheard in Persephone Theatre

Michelle and I were at Persephone Theatre tonight seeing At the End of Her Rope, and we couldn’t help but listen to the coversation of the people behind us.

Kid’s Aunt: Pretty soon they’re going to be able to medically create earthquakes.
Kid’s Mother: You should never try to play God.

I fear the day of medically induced earthquakes. Just another scientific discovery that will be used for destruction.

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Overheard in Saskatoon

I was in the networking section of Future Shop the other day, standing by a couple of guys looking at routers.

Younger Dude: So wireless-N is the fastest right now?
Older Dude: That’s right.
Younger Dude: Yeah, but is it going to be too fast?

We all know how annoying fast internet connections can be.

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I’ve Been Elfed

It seems that Adam had a bit of spare time on his hands and decided to “Elf” some of the guys. Pretty funny stuff. Watch the video here.

The Boys Get Elfed

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The Meaning of Naids

I was recently doing a vanity search on Google. Searching on “Hemant Naidu” came up with the usual results putting this blog at the number one spot, and the “Not There Benefit CD Against Wal-Mart” bringing up second place. Surprisingly I had never performed a search on my nickname, “Naids”. I thought for sure that this blog would again be at the top of the search results. Instead my blog came up in the number seven spot.

Up at the top was a website called naids.org and when I clicked on it there seemed to be a lot of links to AIDS websites. Very interesting. Then not much further down the search results there was something that caught my eye - “Urban Dictionary: naids”. Imagine my surprise when I followed the link and found out that “NAIDS” has come to mean:

The kind of AIDS that you get from sharing needles.

Oh my god, I have NAIDS! I never should have shared that needle with Miles.

So I just wanted to take this moment to clarify the meaning of my nickname. As most of you know, my last name is “Naidu”, pronounced ny-doo. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to determine the origin of my nickname - merely a shortening of my last name to “Naids”, pronounced nides. The urban dictionary word “NAIDS” is an acronym, and is pronounced nayds.

There is NO CORRELATION with my nickname and the urban definition. My nickname IS NOT a reflection of my immune system not functioning due to me sharing needles with drug addicts. I CAN GUARANTEE that my immune system is strong and that I have NEVER used a needle for recreational drug use. The only needles ever inserted into my body have been administered by trained medical professionals.

Note that these search results are based on Google’s current Page Rank for websites containing the word “naids”. Hopefully over time the Page Rank of my pages will creep to the number one position.

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The L.A. Campaign : Exciting Sub-Post 2 : Traffic Dancing

Even when stuck in a traffic jam in downtown L.A., something sweet can go down. See video below:

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E.T. Was a Jedi

I am going to pose a question - was E.T. a Jedi? Some of you may be thinking, WTF? This may sound like an outrageous question with an obvious answer, but there is evidence that he was in fact, a Jedi. Let me take a moment to state my case as to why I would answer this question with an unequivocal ‘yes’.

Srong evidence exists in both ‘Star Wars : The Phantom Menace’ and ‘E.T. The Extra-terrestrial’. Fans with a keen eye would have noticed that E.T.’s race is represented in the Galactic Senate of the Star Wars universe. In ‘Phantom’ this is seen when a motion for a vote of non-confidence is raised during a session of congress. If you haven’t noticed this, look to the bottom left of the screen once the motion is raised.

Such evidence also exists in ‘E.T.’ When E.T. and the kids are out for Hallowe’en in the movie, E.T sees a child dressed up in a Yoda outfit and is drawn towards him, repeatedly saying, ‘home’ and pointing at him. So this would suggest that E.T. recognized Yoda. Obviously he didn’t know Yoda personally since E.T. was set in the late 20th century, and the events of Star Wars took place a long time ago. But it is safe to say that E.T. simply knows of Yoda since he is legendary. It may even be possible that E.T. has communed with Yoda after he became one with the force.

The last piece of evidence is that E.T. clearly has Jedi powers. In the movie he is able to do fantastic stunts such as levitate objects and influence people with his mind. If you ask me, that sounds awfully similar to the Jedi we have seen in the Star Wars movies. The assumption was that all of E.T.’s race had such powers, but now that assumption may not be warranted.

This question is really up for debate since there is no documentation to support the ‘E.T. - Jedi’ theory. I just ask that you open your mind to the possibility. The evidence is there for everyone to see.

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What to Do?

I missed Blogging for the last couple days due to my current dilemma of not really having an address. On Tuesday I felt a great disturbance in the force and decided I better stay in Saskatoon. I managed to get a hold of Jason and Cheryl and they were generous enough to take me in for the night. Right out of the office I headed for Futureshop since the greatest movie in the history of movies was released on DVD that day - ‘Star Wars : Revenge of the Sith’. I had been waiting for that day for quite some time, and now the complete saga is in my possession - furthering my journey to unstoppability.

Once again my Jedi senses paid off - Wednesday morning was brutal due to snow and freezing rain. That could have made for treacherous drive. As the day neared a finish fatigue had set in, killing my desire to drive back to Wilkie, plus the Toronto Raptors season opener was only an hour away (Wilkie was at least 90 minutes away - you see the problem). Once again I placed a call to my billets and they graciously obliged to take me in. The Raps game was good, even though they picked up a loss.

Thursday at the office was good as I continue to settle into my new job. Day’s end arrived and I found myself back in Wilkie. As I was unloading my car the last thing I grabbed was the unopened ‘Episode III’ DVD I had bought only two days ago. At this moment I found myself in a serious predicament - do I watch this fine piece of cinema on my father’s 27 inch bargain television with stereo sound, or do I wait another month to watch it in proper fashion on my 50 inch LCD rear project Grand Wega television in glorious 6.1 digital surround sound? What would the Jedi Council suggest?

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